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Thursday, August 26, 2010

Thank you

It is midnight here and jet lag has me awake.  It's been a long day and one of the hardest in so many ways.  Yet the peace that passes all understanding is pouring over our spirits as the prayers of the saints are being lifted on our behalf.  We are speechless at how many are reaching out to us and to our boys.  Thank you from the very bottom of our hearts.

Aaron fell before we arrived tonight.  His face was swollen, his lip was cut and the scrapes and bruises on his body made us want to cry.  He was close to tears when they brought him to us and was again refusing to make eye contact.  We were not sure if it was from the fall or from the fact that we did not visit him this morning.  When we were here before, we visited him twice a day for a total of three hours.  I believe the combination of the pain of falling and the terror that we had left him again were the reasons for his demeanor.  Rob held him on his lap for almost 40 minutes.  We looked through the photo album that we finally were able to show him.

 Sometimes mistakes are beneficial.  When we came before, we had brought a photo album that had pictures of our family, the house, Aaron's bedroom etc. etc.  The album was left in one of the taxi's and we never were able to show it to Aaron.  While home I printed a whole mess of pictures that I took of Aaron.  On Wednesday, I inserted those pictures on every page (Luda found the album for us) - mingling them with the family pictures.  It means that at each turn, he sees himself and a picture of either the boys in all their goofiiness or the house or his bedroom.  The child STUDIES those pictures.  He makes little response but it is a big deal for him.  Yesterday and today we carefully went through the album with Aaron, looking at each pictures (there are a lot of pictures) affirming and confirming that he was a BIG part of our family.  After the album we read his other favorite book.  He did not want to walk around so we took the new truck and some other smaller vehicles and sat and just played quietly.  At the very end of our time he was finally willing to get up and walk. I think the pain from his fall had subsided by that point. We are going at his pace and in his time.  Loving on him, kissing him (Mommy's can't help doing that) and just being with him.  He is NOT the same child we were with a month ago.  It hurts that his hurt is so evident.  His laughter is contagious and to not hear it makes the world a bit more lonely.
    I will say it again and again.  God is good.  He is wise in ALL of His ways and despite what took place today in court, we know that we are going to be okay.   I could write more but need to rest.  The comments and e-mails and Facebook messages are precious.  Thank you to the RR people who have banded together to not only minister to us but to our boys at home. 

We do have internet access in our apartment.  That has been the one really nice part of the day.  It is not great for Skype but allows us to have better access to the outside world. 

9 comments:

  1. Oh how our hearts were broken for you and Aaron to read that the Judge has scheduled you to come back in 2 weeks . . . we are praying for God's loving presence to fill you . . . and for provisions financially . . . and for Aaron to experience healing and re-growth of trust . . .

    I'm sure you have read a lot of stuff about attachment building therapy . . . feeding him (actually putting the food into his mouth), massaging his skin with lotions etc. In a way, knowing he he reacted the way he did is encouraging (though painful) because it shows he does have the ability to bond and then be hurt when that attachment was broken even temporarily. I know it's hard right now, but I'm blessed as I see how God is helping you! HUGS from Ohio!

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  2. Poor little boy! I'm so glad that you're there to be with him. I really like the album idea! He'll come around with you two double teaming him with attention! And you're right. God IS in charge, and He will take care of all of this. I've got 2 more people praying. Enjoy your time with Aaron tomorrow!

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  3. You are both already such wonderful parents to this young boy.Prayers for you all~

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  4. Praying for you! In the darkest moments, God has a great way of showing us love--through simple joys of giggles and photo albums.

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  5. Julia and Rob, I keep thinking of the reason for the delay with court...I am feeling like God is in control and he knows that Aaron needs time to heal from the past months and then time to grieve the only caregivers he has had since moving from the baby house. Had this all been "easy" and you on the way home in the next few days, perhaps that would have created new wounds of loss that Aaron would have to process in a a whole new country. I just keep feeling like you are there for an extended time because it is what Aaron needs to gather himself and be ready to say goodbye to that place forever. Hang in there!!!

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  6. Hello! I don´t usually comment but I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you and your family. I have been following Aaron´s story and have held you in the light of prayer, and continue to do so, especially now. May He who sustains us give you the grace to continue to fight for the life of this precious child.

    I am a catholic nun (American born) living and working in an orphanage in Bolivia, where we are, by the grace of God and the generosity of others, able to care for our girls and love them, but I have seen how terrible some of these places can be and can imagine how hard it has been to be away from Aaron and now reunited under such difficult circumstances. I think you are doing the best thing you can by just loving him and letting him take the lead with what he is comfortable with.

    May God bless you and fill your hearts with His peace!

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  7. I am here with you in prayer and sending you a big hug and maybe a virtual stack of pancakes or some other comfort food that will stop the growl and fuel the fire. In the south we butter every single one, both sides, you know:) Aaron will like them too one day soon I bet! This too shall pass. The motto for all adoptions I think....always your friend, cathy

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  8. Hey Julia. Our peace lily bloomed for the first time in months yesterday. Peaking out from among the old, brown, cracked leaves, mingling with new green growth, was a beautiful peace bloom. Praying that God's peace is rising for you today among the new growth, and that which needs pruning.

    What a beautiful thing the Lord did with your photo album! Thank you! Have you shown this to the judge, to the social workers, to the inspector? We showed our album to EVERYONE and I do think they were able to see that we truly LOVE Katya and were adopting her for financial benefit (what?!?) or to harvest organs (you have to be kidding?!?), but because we had fallen in love with this little girl and already considered her to be our daughter.

    If you want to email me with any specifics of what the judges/social workers in Aaron's country/city were looking for, mis-steps that we made, mis-steps that those who were immediately in front of us made that impacted us, etc., please do. I'm not comfortable writing all that here, nor are you, probably. Regardless, I'm praying.

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  9. You have a new video message on your prayer site at www.psalm6012.weebly.com

    We are going to post a new video message for you every few days and prayers everyday, until you are home with Aaron:)

    The boys' will start getting cards next week and they will also get encouraging words until you are home:)

    One more day there is also one closer to coming home.

    In him,
    Gretchen

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Loving words from kind people make our hearts glad!